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Knowledge for Newbies: 5 Simple Insights for Fresh Parents (Part 1)


baby1Becoming a new parent is one of the most life-altering events you will ever experience, and requires a huge amount of learning, surrendering,exploring, growing and discovering.  It is like starting a new job without any training or manual to learn from.  All the other employees have been around forever and seem to think it is their sole purpose in life to tell you how to do your work but none of them are staying after hours to help you get the project done. Parenting can feel lonely and overwhelming, yet once you find your way it can be the most amazing journey ever traveled.  So, here are a few tips to help make the path a little more clear for you as you start your new job:

Let Go Of Expectations

Wow, this is a big one.  This is one of the most anticipated events of your life.  It is scary and exciting all at the same time.  Expectations and plans help us make sense of the unknown--and a new baby is uncharted territory. When plans don’t go as we expect though, it is hard to adjust and enjoy the moment for what it is and not what we expected it to be.  Just being aware of our expectations is a step in the right direction.  "I was expecting the baby to sleep longer", "I was expecting to breast feed", "I was expecting a girl". Don't get hung up on what you had planned, but try to stay open to new possibilities of what parenting could be like.

Parenting Is A Process, Not A Destination

Before baby even arrives, most parents have read all the right books, registered their child for Mommy-and-Me classes, decorated the room, researched the best diapers, taken lessons on how to push and open the stroller and started making homemade organic baby food.  We cannot “parent” until the baby arrives and we really have no idea what is going to be expected of us until we get to meet our baby.  You cannot start your job until you arrive at your office or receive your first project.  So expertise--parenting expertise just like work expertise--develops over time.  It means you are going to make mistakes and you are not going to necessarily be able to do it all, and definitely not perfectly.  Becoming a skilled and confident parent takes practice, time and conscious effort.   So, meet the baby first and then start your journey together.

Try Not To Compare

Every child is unique and comes pre-packaged with their own personality, likes, and mannerisms.  You are unique and that means the relationship between you and your child is unique.  It is an accumulation of your personality, your child’s personality and the dynamic between you.  Comparing your child to those of others forces us to focus on what our child cannot do verses what they can do and we miss the things that make them so special and valuable.  This is what Brene Brown, author of “The Gifts of Imperfecting Parenting" refers to as "scarcity rather than gratitude." Practice gratitude.  Your child’s self-esteem and self-worth will thank you for it. Ultimately, this way you will become a more confident parent.

To Be Continued...

The final 2 ingenious insights will be served up in Part 2 of this blog! Stay tuned!

Do you have questions or comments as a new parent? Feel free to comment below or visit

Posted by Ishtar Gabriel in Parent, General ← Previous Post Next Post →

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